Are you a person like me who has thousands or even millions of notes to little blips just sitting in your note's app? Or maybe you have a journal that is filled with so much writing and heartfelt moments that in the moment felt so good but are too scared or never would show anybody those words. If so, I can totally relate to you.
As you can tell I took so much time from writing as I couldn't find anything 'worthy' to say. Everything didn't feel original or "complete" to put out. Everywhere I looked everyone had a beautifully written blog or caption that could never compare to my little note's app blips.
About two weeks ago I attended a youth teen camp with my church and had such a wonderful time of fellowship and made some wonderful memories. We didn't have our phones or a device with us for the whole week and I can tell you, I have never felt closer to the people around me and especially the Lord. It's funny how much He is trying to reach us if we'd just shut out the world. They had given us a little pamphlet when we got there that had a section on what we learned from the Lord and all I could think the first day was, how am I going to fill in those lines.
All throughout camp I just kept asking God- speak to me. Help me where I am lacking. Lift me to where I'm supposed to be. In all honesty though, I was praying those prayers, but one thing was holding me back. Fear. Not necessarily the fear that we think of, like being scared of the dark and etc. but fear of failure. As a perfectionist like me, the constant feeling of fear of failure, comparison, worry, anxiety, depression, and more are constantly in my life. I'm sure many others struggle as well.
One of the messages that stood out to me that week of camp was the guest speaker, Brother Judeh, preached on drowning your Jonah (anything stopping you from following the will of God). What he meant was that we are to not let anything, no matter what, hold you back and pull you under from what the Lord has for you. What I pulled personally was that I was not going to let fear, worry, or anything from then on drag me under and drown me. To not let something consume or stop me from doing His will. Brother Judeh's message made me realize I was not actually being consumed by my fear, but I was letting it control parts of me. I was letting it decide for me and holding on to it with a firm grip, while still asking God to free me. I was not letting Him help me let go of the problem. My grasp on comfort is great and the parts where I couldn't do something, I leaned on my fear even more and when those self-doubting thoughts came, I leaned on them, but the truth was revealed to me. Every day I will inevitably hear those thoughts from myself and even from others saying I wasn't or am not cut out for something, but I'm ready to know that they may be true, but my faith needs to be bigger. My faith in my Savior needs to be bigger and stronger than my fear, and I need to do everything in the RIGHT fear. The right fear of the Lord.
That is what I wrote in those pamphlet lines. The few words I scribbled down, "Don't let fear stop you from doing anything for the Lord," were the God-given words that immediately sprang into my brain, and I knew then and there that they would be my verse for the week. At the beginning of the week, I had no clue what I would learn from the Lord, yet He communicates to us in amazing ways. I'm learning to follow through on the strong conviction I had, and I can honestly say that the Lord talked to me simply. Simply through the words of a messenger, and for that, I'm very grateful He did. I will stumble, we all will, but we will never fail when we rely on Him. You got this! Conquer your fear(s) through Him.
He's waiting for you to listen & trust Him.
❀ 𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐨𝐭; 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐞: 𝐛𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐝; 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐲 𝐆𝐨𝐝: 𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐞; 𝐲𝐞𝐚, 𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐞; 𝐲𝐞𝐚, 𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐮𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬. ❀ 𝐈𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐚𝐡 𝟒𝟏:𝟏𝟎
❀𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐆𝐨𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐮𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫; 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝.❀ 𝟐 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐲 𝟏:𝟕
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